We have all come across manipulators at some point in our lives. Interactions with manipulators can be hazardous, as they can hurt us emotionally, financially, and psychologically. Therefore, it is quite essential to know how to tackle the dirty tricks used by these types of manipulators. In this article, we will discover twelve types of manipulators.
We meet manipulators almost every day, and it doesn’t matter what level they work – a colleague at work or a family member even on social media. You might face manipulation in marriage or manipulation in a relationship or even manipulation in a friendship.
How to identify a manipulator?
Most of the time, we pay less attention to the handling of the manipulator’s actions and do nothing. Manipulations are so often present in everyday life that they are not perceived critically. So, how do you decide that you are being manipulated and resisted?
It is possible to determine the manipulator according to the Karpman simple theory. The so-called drama triangle contains three components – the victim, the persecutor, and the rescuer. As a rule, the manipulator acts as either a victim or a rescuer. In this situation, there is always a certain persecutor or oppressor from whom you need to either rescue the manipulator or the manipulator himself intends to save you. In everyday life, we often face this kind of manipulation. In this way, even a child can manipulate, or alternatively, make the oppressor one parent or another.
Spoiler Alert: If you are not a fan of reading then there is a video at the end of this article that covers this topic.
Types of manipulators:
1. Who pretend to be victims
Be very careful of these types of manipulators who will pretend to be victims of unfortunate events, abuse, and etcetera. An example of this manipulation is that they may narrate their stories in an unemotional and unimpassioned way.
Remember, they don’t actually want your support. Instead, they have their personal goals in mind and want to gain your sympathies. This type of manipulation in friendship is very common nowadays.
It is very important to identify them from people who are actually victims and seek your help. You can define the false victims by carefully observing their demeanor.
2. The ones who give you the ‘silent treatment’
People who fall in this category tend to be emotional manipulators. They refrain from speaking to you and even acknowledging your presence. But they can skillfully portray their feelings of aversion through gestures and expressions.
This type of manipulators may want to invite you to do something, degrade you or express their resentment by remaining silent. This kind of emotional manipulation technique is very common in a toxic relationship.
3. Who makes you feel guilty
Sometimes, people tend to make decisions irrationally, and without listening to the advice of family or friends. They regret it once their decision turns out to be erroneous.
But instead of owning up and accepting their mistake, they choose to blame others for their failure. A manipulator uses this manipulation technique for making you feel guilt-ridden and responsible for their short-comings.
4. The ones who constantly embarrass you
You may notice that there are some people who never let go of a chance to put you down. They might shame you on your physical appearance, family or failures to make you feel inferior and unworthy.
These manipulators might cover their demeaning comments in a joke but be sure to identify their tone and expressions. This type of emotional manipulation is very common in friendship which is even more visible in social media.
5. Who plays innocent
There are some people who will hurt you, and when confronted, will just deny doing anything wrong. Beware, these types of manipulators know the art of lying. Don’t let their denial confuse you into thinking that you weren’t wronged.
Psychologist George K. Simon, the author of the book In Sheep’s Clothing, explains,
This ‘who…. Me?’ The tactic is a way of playing innocent and invites the victim to feel unjustified in confronting the aggressor about the inappropriateness of their behavior. It’s also the way the aggressor gives himself/herself permission to keep right on doing what they want to do.
6. The ones who use allurement
This manipulative personality uses their excessive charm and the power of seduction to get things done. They may require something from you or may have any other personal motive in mind. This kind of manipulation is very common in a new relationship or marriage.
7. The ones who ‘play dumb’
These types of manipulative personality will always seem to ‘not know’ about the situation and their responsibilities. They will pretend to be unable to comprehend you when you try explaining to them. In turn, they’ll want to manipulate you into taking up their responsibilities. You will meet this type of manipulative personality in the workplace more often.
8. The ones who lie
True manipulators are masters of lying and may aim to trick or confuse you. If they feel they can get what they want by lying, they will definitely do it. They may also conceal part of the truth. What’s more, they won’t even feel bad as they do not live by a moral code.
9. The ones who distort the truth and present it
These types of manipulators will often distort the truth and present their own twisted version to you. With persuasion, they can even make you believe in it.
How to deal with this kind of manipulative personality? Do trust your own knowledge and make sure to double-check before believing what the other person says.
10. The ones who constantly change the topic
Many times, when we try to talk to people about a serious issue, they will keep changing the topic. They will try to evade the topic of discussion so that they don’t become the focal point. Manipulators often use the tool of diversion to avoid accountability for their behaviors. This kind of manipulation techniques is often used by the politician.
11. The ones who pretend to be ‘helpless’
Beware of these types of manipulators. You may encounter them during your educational or work lives. They will keep wanting help from you and will present themselves as helpless. But the truth is that they are probably too lazy to put in the effort and do their own work.
University students will often come across people who ask for their assignments. They may pretend to be weak in their studies. Be sure to identify these types of emotional manipulation from those who sincerely require help.
12. The ones who daunt you
This can intimidate you in various ways, including by words and gestures. Notice if people are excessively controlling and make you feel uncomfortable. The best way to deal with this kind of manipulative personality is to confront them or stop interacting with them.
Keep your eyes wide open, and senses alert at all times! You never know when you will come across a manipulator. Hopefully, this article will help you to identify the different types of manipulators and not to fall prey to their tactics. Click here to watch the video on YouTube.