Looking for the positive parenting tips? Well, you have come to the right place. Parenting is not an easy job. As Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung once said, “Children are educated by what the grown-up is and not by his talk”.
Let me start by saying that if you’re reading this with a sense of abject failure, with kids destroying your home, and a partner who thinks you’ve let yourself go, you are not alone. But don’t worry, you’re doing a lot better than you think.
Here are fifteen positive parenting tips every parent should know. Read on!
1. Be who you want them to be
Whatever you do in life, your children will mirror you, whether immediately or in years to come. If you don’t want them to smoke or drink, don’t be a smoker or drinker. If you want them to read books, read books yourself. And don’t use your phone! Read a real book so that they know you’re reading and then they will imitate you.
2. Love them no matter what
Positive parenting starts with your own actions. Your children are not the same as your favorite shirt or handbag, that you may like one week and dislike the next. You must love your kids every second of every minute of every day.
Moreover, you must show them that you love them no matter what. If you need to deal with a toddler then you can follow several toddler discipline tactics that work.
3. Be firm but fair
It is not fair to keep changing your mind. Your kids need constants in their lives and that includes the rules and regulations that you want them to live by. This means you also need to be on the same page as your partner. Agree together on what is acceptable and what is not and stick with it.
4. Be the person your child goes to
If you are not the person your child runs to, then you’re doing something wrong. Of course, your child may go to you for some things and your partner for others, and there is no problem with that. As long as your child feels she has somewhere to go for help, then hopefully they’ll keep coming to you when they’re older.
5. Communicate with your children
Talk to your children as often as you can about anything and everything. But communication is not just talking but also listening. When your child is talking to you, give them your attention. Don’t brush your child aside when they want to talk. Remember that there will come a time when you want to talk to your children and they’ll be too busy for you.
6. Remember you were a child
Our next positive parenting tips are that try to remember that you were a child once, interested in childish things and preoccupied with childish thoughts that seemed so serious. As far as your child is concerned, their thoughts are just the same.
While listening to your child’s ideas on why Barney the Dinosaur is purple for the thousandth time may be somewhat trying, for your child, this is a serious concern.
7. Never ever smack
I’m sorry if this sounds all incense and kaftans, but there is never an occasion when your child deserves a smack. Parents smack children because of their own worries, anger or frustration, not because the child deserves it.
Remember, that every smack you give your child can seem like a betrayal, and your child may never forget it. Beware, regarding the traits of toxic parenting which can ruin children’s lives.
8. Keep things in perspective
Your little angel running around like as a crazy thing may seem like the most annoying moment in your life but it’s not. Children run around and make noise. That, and eating you out of the house and home and costing a fortune, is their raison d’etre when. Whatever your child is doing is nothing in the big scheme of things. So, treat it as such.
9. Don’t punish, praise
The key to positive parenting is praise but no punishment. Praising your child is so much more positive than punishing. Praising influences more positive behavior in children whereas punishment has the exact opposite effect. Praise often and continually, punish rarely if ever.
10. Avoid sarcasm
If you are the sort of person who responds sarcastically to things your friends say, don’t do it with your children. Sarcasm is a negative response, even when meant humorously. But it is also difficult to understand and your children may not have the intellectual capacity to understand sarcasm, so praise positively, not sarcastically.
11. Limit the internet
As positive parents, as well as an adult and your children, are not, and you know what is best for your kids. The internet, in general, is not a positive place for your children to spend their time. If your children need the internet for school, then they should be using it in front of you, and not unsupervised in their bedrooms.
12. Say no to gadgets
This was one of the strictest rules when my kids were growing up. They could have as many books as they liked, and I would buy them books for most weeks. However, no matter how often they asked for a phone, iPad, or other gadgets, my answer was always the same. They are far safer without gadgets than with them.
13. Accept life has changed
When you have children, your own life is well and truly over. Okay, that may be an exaggeration but your control over your life pretty much is. From the moment your first child is born, your wants and needs come second to your children’s. Accept that and get over it; you’ll be happier when you do.
14. Ask for help
If you need help, ask for it. You are not some sort of super-parent and, more importantly, you are not expected to be. You may want to do everything on your own but you must accept help when it’s offered, and ask for it when it is not. Save your energy for the times when there is no one around but you.
15. Remember you are human
Do not set standards for yourself that are unrealistic. You can’t be there for your children 24/7 and no one expects you to be. Things go wrong when kids are involved and 99 times out of 100 whatever went wrong has very little importance in the big scheme of things.
And there you have all the positive parenting tips. When you have kids, don’t take life too seriously, accept that even the best-laid plans go wrong and that you are not perfect and no one expects you to be. My one last tip, actually more an admonishment, is to spend your life enjoying your children; they won’t always be around.